In 1997, a couple of years after the birth of THE GIFT A Woman's Rite to HerSelf it became very clear that we needed to offer the same sacred gateway to the men. Since the beginning of The GIFT, women had been asking for a space where they could share this depth of sacredness with the men in their lives and were grieving that there was no form they knew of where this could occur. There were also many men who had been touched by the extraordinary transformation in the women in their lives who had experienced THE GIFT and had felt the power of being around these weekends. They wanted to know about and experience this power and depth for themselves. It became more and more difficult to say why they should not have access to it, just because they weren't women. In essence, we are all divine beings with a birthright to know ourselves as such, and we knew no better doorway to this place than the Rite.

We were already experiencing the challenges of training other women and were not sure how to transfer this to the men without compromising the fine and delicate integrity of the space. We were also reluctant we found, because we held a deep, culturally inherited caution about the masculine, patriarchal need to dominate, own or control things of power and we knew this to be the unleashing of some very ancient and powerful forces. We held this particular gateway to be very much an initiation into the territory of the Sacred Feminine - which it is - and were not sure how this would translate for men. While it is not possible to 'own' such a thing, we were concerned for the integrity of the transmission. We felt sure it was not our place to be there for men's business and were for a while caught in opposing belief systems. Our initial journeying into this exploration with men was fraught with inevitable woundings between the sexes as we struggled to find a way to transmit the radiance of this treasured jewel.

It eventually became apparent that the only way to do this, was to do it. It could not be explained, it could only be experienced and it was definitely time to begin the bridging of the separation between sexes in this way. We got some direct guidance to just do it and because of the deep intimacy of this space, this was quite a courageous leap.
So into the unknown again.

Our guidance was very clear. Set a date for the first Grail weekend in Austin, Texas. First go to England, the home of the Green Man, the Horned God, Cernunnos, the origins of our bloodlines, and receive the transmission from the land itself. It seems there is still enough ancient knowing of Earth magic and its practices still held within the land, its sacred sites, leylines and within the genetics of its people for this to be possible. There are many threads of earth honouring ritual still active throughout Europe. It is still acceptable for men to 'dowse' for water and energy lines within the earth and we were shown very specifically that men do indeed have the capacity to receive information through their bodies this way, just as women do in the Rite.

After tromping through fields of crop circles with Trinda, tracing Michael and Mary lines through southern England and visiting ancient sacred sites in Glastonbury, Avebury, etc., Nirado returned to America armed with masses of research material to cook and brew with Kisha. (Much of this is on our resources page). We eventually felt we had woven enough threads of 'male sacred mythology' into the basket to offer our first ever initiation for men, guided by women. It was clear that there should always be 3 women present, representative of the triple Goddess, Maiden/Mother/Crone.

This willingness to risk and share was met by 12 courageous men who showed up to dive deep into the depths of their longing for wholeness. They spoke unanimously of their having the courage to go as deeply as they did in the weekend because the women were able to hold a point of polarity; fierce ruthless, compassion with love and acceptance. It seems the presence of women as gatekeepers, is symbolic of the Goddess, in all her forms and it is into her sanctuary that men in many ancient cultures were ushered by the priestess for the final initiation into manhood. Co-incidentally, it was often during 3 days, the time it takes for one phase of the Moon. Once again we seemed to be being guided into some ancient truths and realities of which we were not consciously aware when we started.

So, despite our 'idea' that we would eventually train men to hold this work, it has so far been expressed by the men that this unique form of initiation into the Sacred Feminine where the women are present to 'hold space' for the men, allows some alchemy that would not otherwise occur. Make no mistake; this is very much a men's journey. There just happen to be women there. Men in the company of men are very different animals and it is appropriate that they also explore their manhood in other ways, where women have no business being present. However in this particular space it seems the role of the priestess is an important one.

In the closing circle of this first Grail, one man used the example of a storyline he had seen in an old movie, where mortally wounded in battle, the hero was to have his wound cauterised by a hot sword (or something). No amount of liquor or number of men could hold him still for this, until just one woman was summoned, (no doubt the beautiful heroine) who touched his heart, gently pushed him back down to the table and held his gaze while he surrendered to this excruciating ordeal. For this man in The Grail, his experience was that without the presence of the women, he would not have had the courage to face and feel the pain of his old wounds, thereby allowing them to heal.

Though as male and female we often hold very different life orientation, what became abundantly clear, through the privilege of witnessing each man come home to himself through this magical, mysterious gateway, was despite our different 'wiring' on many levels, at a soul level, there is truly no difference between the sexes. The Creatrix meets us all in our essence, regardless of gender. It seems that in more fully embracing the Goddess and diving into the unpredictable nature of Being, each man somehow knew and understood his deep masculine more thoroughly and most importantly, trusted himself more.

The incredibly unique essence in each of us seems to be yearning to live a fully embodied life, whether that be male or female and to be seen, loved and honoured for the gifts we bring. In the extraordinary timeless space we create together in The GRAIL or The GIFT, men and women are allowed a tangible remembrance of their divine birthright - to live as pure awareness, love and light in conscious harmony with all beings.

This continues to be truly empowering and life transforming for us all.